I can’t predict, so I plan.

Having a child with a severe mood disorder forces me to look at the future through a different lens than my friends with neurotypical kids. I hope my daughter will be able to complete college, live independently, and hold a job, but I don’t know if that will be possible. Creating a safety net helps me to feel much more secure, especially since my daughter has passed that scary milestone, her 18^th birthday.

1. Nickelodeon's "iCarly" Stigmatizes Mental Illness
by Susan Resko, Executive Director

The joyful holiday season is fast approaching and yet there are people who cry out, “Bah, humbug!” as they struggle with the obstacles and challenges many families face. I knew this season had its pitfalls from my earliest years. When I was a child, my mother would work hard to provide our family with the best possible Christmas season possible. Beautifully prepared meals, lots of baking, homemade and thoughtful gifts, entertaining, and many memories…including hospitalizations or a flare-up of my mother’s symptoms once the holidays were over.

Everywhere you go, you hear about it--Bullying. Sad stories abound. But Kira's story is different. This 16-year-old with bipolar disorder describes terrible things her bullies did to her online and how she fought back...and won!

In my last blog, I talked about the positives of being open with a child about his/her diagnosis. But just like "the birds and the bees," learning about bipolar disorder or depression is not about one big conversation. It involves many small conversations over years. It’s also about creating openness so that your child can feel free to come to you with questions.

Tracy Anglada, mental health writer, advocate, and mother, shares her top tips in this second entry in the The Balanced Mind Foundation back to school series for parents raising kids with depression and bipolar disorder.

Brace yourself! Transitions are tough for kids with mood disorders, and the fall return to school is one of the biggest transitions our kids face.

You may notice a spike in anxiety and irritability in the weeks before school begins, as anticipation builds. It can be nearly impossible to rouse our kids from bed and get them dressed, fed and out the door when nothing much is planned. All this is magnified for the momentous first days of school.

We have all had many “transitions” in our lives. If one has lived long enough we likely have experienced many life transitions including new jobs, ends of jobs, marriages, break-ups, children, moves to new cities, and many other changes that nudge our lives in other directions, both planned and unplanned. Think for a minute about the feelings you had during these times. What a plethora of emotions: excitement, fear, hesitancy, confidence, vulnerability, anticipation!

It is safe to say that my daughter was much more excited about her approaching 18^th birthday than I was.

For my daughter, the milestone marked adulthood under the law, with all the rights and responsibilities that come with majority. Turning 18 meant she could vote for president, sign contracts, choose where to live, and make decisions about her medical treatment. And, of course, get a tattoo.

While our children are young we sometimes think of this illness as our challenge but as they age, it truly is their illness. Help them manage it to the best of their ability. 

The funny thing about kids is they don’t stay young forever. They do grow up! From the moment my son was diagnosed with bipolar disorder, I had a sense of urgency. My thought process was something along the lines of: “I only have ten more years to teach him how to manage this on his own.” What’s ten years really? Now that my son is 18, we are proof that it flies by.

Kids with bipolar disorder may not be ready to manage all aspects of their illness just because the calendar says they are an adult, but the goal is to help them understand and manage it the best they can as they reach these critical transition years. While this will be different according to the abilities and progress of each child, starting early gives a distinct advantage. Here are some of the things we found beneficial: