You know how you have a different girlfriend for different things? The girlfriend that you go to concerts with. The girlfriend you can travel with. The girlfriend that knows all about you and sticks around anyway. When I first started this journey with son, I had no idea that I would need a girlfriend just to help me with all things bipolar.
 

I’ve mentioned in a previous blog post that my son Tim is in long-term residential treatment.  He was admitted last August, and right now, his estimated discharge date is sometime during the summer of 2011.  It’s incomprehensible to me that he will be gone from our home that long.  I can only digest it in chunks of weeks, thinking only to the next day visit up, or his next overnight visit home.  Tim understands why he’s there and what he’s working on while he’s there, but since he’s learning skills as well as being educated, Tim calls

Life has taught me a lot about boundaries. I view them as protective as well as restrictive, and practice has made me better at setting clear limits and sticking to them.

When my daughter first went to a residential treatment center at 16, I was painfully conflicted over the placement decision that kept her safe and gave the rest of the family relief from rages and some space to heal. When my daughter accused me of “abandonment” during our first phone call, I burst into sobs, so upset that her counselor ended up consoling me.