10th grader in a theraputic day school
My son was dx bipolar at age 7 and we have had some stable times. However, more have been unstable.
Here's my problem, when he gets mad, he gets destructive and is agressive. It doesn't take much to get him mad; it can be not getting his way, getting frustrated with something, not liking something, etc.
Right now he has charges pending for threatening to destroy the school bus if the driver didn't stop and let him get off. He was cussing and very threatening. He was mad because the driver passed our street twice and didn't turn to drop him off. Now he is kicked off the school bus and I have to transport him. The school said they would pay me but they did not feel that it was safe for them to have someone transport him.
He is a big boy - age 15 and 10 months - 6 ft 1 inches, 235 pounds. Last week he picked a desk up over his head and threatend to throw it at another kid. He has punched holes in walls at school and home. It is getting to the point that I don't think the school is going to deal with him much longer. Can they kick a 16 year old kid out of school? Someone told me that they could. He has an IEP.
I just don't know what to do. I can't control him and I don't think he can control himself once he loses his temper. I am working with the pdoc but he is not on the right meds and he has been on so many different meds, I don't know what will work if anything will.
He is on Intuivi, Medidate, Keppra, and Tegratol. They took him off Medidate for a little while last year but the school said that he got distracted too easily without it. He has been on both Depakote and Lithium before but they both casused major weight gain. He is at least 50 pounds over weight.
Last year it got so bad that I actually asked the school system to consider Residential care because I felt he needed that much help. They would not do it because of the cost. He has been put in the hospital twice in the last year and a half. They keep him a week or two and let him out. Even at the hospital, they kept him seperate from other kids becuase they were afraid other kids would jump him because of his mouth.
My son is costing the school system a lot of money. They are going to start paying me $381 per week to transport him to and from school (35 miles, 45 minutes drive time each way). He has a one on one and is in a theraputic day school. I guess this is still less expensive than Residential care.
Sorry this is all over the place. I am just frustrated because I don't know where to turn.
Shirley, I understand your frustration. My son was diagnosed at 8 and is now a senior. We've also been through countless meds and countless schools and programs. Right now, we are grappling with placement as well. My son also has PTSD due to some very traumatic experiences prior to our adopting him at 8. Being in chaotic environments really triggers it and Day 3 of school in a new setting resulted in a crisis - and his threat to throw a chair through a window so he could escape when they wouldn't let him go for a walk to cool down.... So now we're looking for a new setting.
I don't know what state you're in, but in California where we live there is a law on the books -- AB3632 that provides for mental health services for children who cannot benefit from an education without them. About two years ago, we requested assessment to see if our son was eligible. Not only was he eligible, but the psychologist who performed the evaluation recommended residential placement. He was in an EXCELLENT residential program with an EXCELLENT school for about a year and a half. He made more academic progress than he had in the previous six years. He flourished -- making friends for the first time, participating in the school music and on the basketball team, going to the prom, etc. It was so wonderful to see... However, once he met the therapeutic goals they had established for residential treatment, he was discharged and allowed to come home. We were told that most of the kids are there for a year or two. If there is something similar in your state, that might be enough time for your son. I would push, push, push for residential treatment. The difference it made for my son was amazing. (If you want info on the program my son was in, let me know because I would highly recommend it.)
Wishing you success with your battle -- because this really is a battle that we have to fight on behalf of our kids!
Shannon
I noticed on your profile that you are in Virginia. This lawyer http://www.virginiaeducationlaw.net/virginiaeducationcaseevaluation.html offers a free consultation, it might be worth contactthem to inquire about anything similar to our AB3632 in California - utilizing this has been immensely helpful for us. You could also check with the VA Dept. of Mental Health, and your local NAMI chapter to see if you can find assistance there as well.
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Shelle, 49 in So Cal - Celexa 20mg, Xanax 0.5mg rarely as needed
Family Response Team member and CABF Support 11
rmadmom@hotmail.com
Single Mom to Rachel, 12 - BP, anxiety, ADHD (or maybe not) - Lamictal 200mg am+Seroquel 50mg am/200mg early pm, Therapeutic School
We also have Birdie, the love bird - she bites; and Scarlett, the kitten - she does too
FROM CABF: Do not start, stop, or change medication or other treatment for yourself or your child based on what you read on this Website or elsewhere on the Internet. Information presented here should not replace the considered judgement of a doctor who knows you or your child.
In addition to looking into alternative or therapeutic programs for your son, I would also take your son to the pdoc to have his meds reviewed. It does not sound as though he has been stabilized. We found that partial day hospitalization programs were sometimes necessary to accomplish that (they should be able to coordinate with the schools so your son wouldn't be considered truant).
One the CABF page, there is a lot of information about how to get the accommodations your son needs in the Education Corner. There are also resources about advocates in the Resources folder. It would probably be a good idea to look into getting more support for your son before he does do something more dangerous -- and that support can be either at the school (if they are equipped) or through a phosp program (if they are not).
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Joan in CA
Co-Moderator of Dual Diagnosis/Substance Abuse group with Becky
Family Response Team Volunteer
Link to my bio: http://www.bpkids.org/user/29354
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